I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
What tipped you off? The sombrero?
He cant even get with danielle. Thats like striking out in t-ball
either my laughing turned him on, or he wanted to shut me up. either way, i dont care. it was amazing.
Lesson Learned this Week... If it seems too good to be true he is probably just trying to get you pregnant.
Dude, didnt you only know that guy for a month and he is demanding offspring?
Apparently, at this age my womb is an early conversation
We thought we were getting kicked out but then he started tickling the bouncer. Next thing you know the bouncers giving him a piggy back ride to the bar.
It's ok, I like adventure. Just ask my vagina.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
If your find a 12 pack on your doorstep consider it a gentleman's agreement to never speak of that night again
Also I'm proud of us for having an educational conversation in this group text.
Fun times on public transportation. I just had a guy imply that I was racist cause I didn't want to talk to him when I was clearly reading my book and he was clearly on coke.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
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