When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He is making me drink his THC water out of a milk jug.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
I'm the only one who goes to a bar and leaves with an extra twenty bucks and a pumpkin.
so getting blacked out last night has made my lips so beautifully red for pictures today... and they say nothing good comes from alcohol
For our 1st date, he tried to schedule a rock climbing. I suggested, "how about we meet at my place and you can scale Mt. Vagina?"
How can I prove that I give 401k advice and not handjobs?
I have a video on my phone of someone streaking in my house last night, do you have any idea who it is?
Randomize
