I just realized I had sex more when i looked like a fat elton john. Fuck my life.
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
you were saying "i am the vodka queen!" and then in a different voice replying to yourself "all hail the vodka queen! you are so beautiful!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
He told me I was a pleasure to arrest. That's the 2nd time I've heard that.
So ahh..."Multicultural Night" turned into "Fuck the Neighbor Night"
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it acceptable to cry on a Friday or am I supposed to drink to forget it?
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
my nurturing instincts told me to take his clothes off
that is very illegal...i love you.
First day of school is awesome. I get to meet my students and figure out which of their mothers I’ I’m going to bang
Randomize