no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
You made me cry and you don't even care
Whats the name of the guy with his hand down my pants?
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
There is a woman in the bar breastfeeding a baby. Doing shots. Gotta love maryland Applebees.
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
Oh well shit happens. This is my not worried face. This is also my still decently drunk face.
i'm about to rub a glazed donut on my face just so it feels like you're here
You need to tell him your pregnant or we need to stop playing doubles beer-pong. My liver is begging you.
Also did I tell you guys about the time that I balled for like an hour at a frat and made them play wagon wheel and then cleaned their bathroom
How do I figure out the name of this sleeping naked guy in my bed?
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I forgot a room to the key..so whenever you wake ip and read this...I'm sleeping inthe hallway..please find me
My conscious state is steadily increasing towards drunkenness.
It was very surreal. They were listening to a religious podcast on morality while they both went down on me.
Randomize
