we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
I feel so much closer to you now that I heard your poop splash into the toilet.
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
we made out inside of a kiddie slide for about 20 mins. it was the sexiest, most suffocating experience I've ever had
25 People Admit the Worst Things They’ve Done for Good Reasons
This has been your unwelcomed wake-up call, brought to you by exes united. Have a good day, to opt out please type "STOP", to continue but act as though they do not exist please enter "DON'T CARE" for random daily wake up texts by exes united please press "PSYCHO!"
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Dude you were so high some kid was kicking the wall and you were convinced it was your heartbeat
Yeah, I wish I could have one upped you. But all I did was ride circles around a cop on a stolen bicycle while laughing at him for telling me to stop riding on the sidewalk.
25 Things All Men Can Definitely Agree On
No...this little piggys going to the bar
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
I just made kick ass drunk stir fry while taking care of three other drunk people and doing shots. I don't understand how that's not wife material
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Using the money underagers give me to buy this semesters books.. My mom would be so proud
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.