I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
After all the hair products he's stolen from me, he better fucking be gay.
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
Your 13 year old niece and her best friend half carried you from the beach to the pool where you then clung onto a raft and screamed about having pretty hair.
I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
This is the drunkest I've ever been at a chili's
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
2 weeks into this dating someone with money thing and I already don't know if I can go back to the being poor life
You fell while talking to a cop, then proceeded to acuse him of tripping you... he was arresting you for public intox.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
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