Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Hey its the Filipino guy from last night. I just wanted to say sorry my friend bled all over your driveway. Great party though.
I found her under my bed eating airplane pretzels.
his grandma walked in on us. twice. and he was truly fucking surprised when i put my pants back on.
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
i can recognize that vagina from a mile away
don't judge, it's breakfast wine Wednesday.
Want me to give your number to an army recruiter?
I don't know... do you want me to use your number to sell used gay porn on Craigslist?
I sense beginning a prank war would end badly for both of us.
Check 'smoke weed with our ihop waiter' off of our To-Do List
Do you have pictures of my pancakes
I need to show the world
They are the pancake equivalent of eventual wife
Maybe? I'm not shaving my pubes for a maybe type of night.
I'm hammerd and his penis is still the size of a giraffe's neck
I feel like with a dick like that he could of done more with it
Randomize
