where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
The new Black Eyed Peas song is the stupidest shit I've heard since the last Black Eyed Peas song.
If God had a period, it would result in diet faygo redpop
LA Sucks. The only way i can get laid is if i tell people im at a law firm that represent film producers.
And when they figure it out, they act like IM shallow.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
if I open my eyes, my head will explode. that hungover.
We ended up debating which Food Network host would do best in porn.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
Let's fuck under the stars. And by under the stars I mean in my bed underneath my glow in the dark star stickers.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
Randomize
