I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
At dinner I grabbed his hand and he screamed "mom she just grabbed my penis" the proceeded to shove my hand down his pants! Hello Mr.Dick!
so do the steelers give the refs blowjobs at halftime or after the game?
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Yeah got a self inflicted broken nose.
I'm playing a little game called "how many shots of jack can I take before I become a shit show tonight". All front row seats are sold out.
All I want to do on Facebook today is comment on people I knew in high schools profile pictures and tell them how much uglier they are now.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
This is the second time you've stolen a pet when you're drunk, given it back and cashed in on a reward...I think you have a problem
Gotta pay my student loans some way
So, i might have left my morals back in 2011.
Although the guy I'm messing around with just offered to let me be his rich brother's sugar baby
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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