Yeah I guess I was Pocahontus. If she were a trifling drunk who hung out in her undies, with possible brain damage.
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
I hope my margaritas pass through security.
dibs on John Mayer's hood pass
his fiance had made him a calendar of pictures of her. he asked if he should take it down and i said no. i wanted her to watch.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
Tom is laying in a bathtub filled with ice pretending to be a polar bear.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
Dude I am allergic to the candy dicks from that sex shop in Vegas. Come take me to hospital right now.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Randomize
