So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
He has been begging me for a Bj but doesnt want to get mono
How is he gunna get mono? is he gunna suck on his dick after you?
Even Lady Gaga hates Purdue
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
It's not my fault. Someone keeps buying me tequila shots. Idk who. But every time I look down there's another. I think there's a conspiracy.
I'm over this relationship. I'm just going to get drunk all day, wake up in a puddle of my own vomit again, and go on with my life
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
What drink are we having for lunch?
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
Do you still have "be bumpin" written on your ass in glitter pen? Who brings a glitter pen to a bar? Or pulls there ass out for that matter...
"I'm looking more at his dick bulge." Never thought I'd hear those words come out of my boyfriend's mouth.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
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