There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
just took a shot of real whiskey... i forgot what it's like to drink liquor that costs more than twelve dollars.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
I'm running on jager fumes right now. It's like I put diesel in a prius and said fuck it.
You've fucked so many I should get a word bank when you make me guess these things.
So my Mom pointed out my vibrator on the night stand next to my stun gun and reminded me of how much I drink.
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
I have nice boobs. Don't wanna deprive anyone of the experience.
You're a saint.
Tbh I’m not a vibrator enthusiast
But I am godly
Randomize
