Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
how's this sound. You, me a box of pink franzia and a night full of possibilities in your basemen. I'll be me. You be you. And we'll see where it goes
I wish my period boobs were my regular boobs.
she was sobbing drunk in the backseat about her dead cat and how the guy in the front seat didn't want to hook up with her
I've heard so many rumors about me being taken home in an ambulance I'm starting to believe them.
We decided we needed a drinks fridge in our bathroom.
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
Ughhh I can't remember the last time "time fell back or springed forward" and I wasn't at the bar to argue about it :(
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
I just want to sit my fat ass down at McDonald's and never leave
I blacked out. Broke into their house. Took a shit, and left. This is why you can't leave me unattended.
Hey what are you up to?
I am wear the people with the mustaches live. I have found their home.
DUDE, WE BOUGHT THE ACID TOGETHER.
Just found a rebirth in peppermint schnapps. May be able to stay up all night and finish this paper after all. MERRY CHRISTMAS
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
