people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
Why do I feel like I used to feel when I almost got caught looking at porn when I get caught looking at facebook at work
so whats your words to drink to for the state of the union? mine are 'change' 'fight' and 'you know'.
mine is 'the'.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I bought a fake diamond ring to wear, not only to bars to keep the creeps away, but so that I'll be judged less by the front desk girl at Planned Parenthood
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
She swung at the pinata with crutches
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
sometimes when you're high at work you just have to say fuck it and eat the dog treats
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude if i sent you a picture of the inside of my fridge would you be able to break down and explain everything that was in it?
She deliberately backed into the homewrecker's whoremobile and yelled ""FOR SPARTA!"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
It seems I've entered my 21st birthday the same way I entered this world: naked, crying and smothered in someone else's bodily fluids...
When you realized the door was unlocked, you did the mission impossible yheme song and snuck into the bathroom. And continued it while you peed.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize