If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
he nicknamed his dick "too big to fail"
Just saw some girl biking on campus with a babyseat on the front. Baby included. Do you know how many points that'd be worth?
when i was alone, his dick was there for me...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
Not to make her into that kind of girl, but she did have a condom mural
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
yeah, i'm probably gonna die. still gonna be totally worth it tho
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
I can't be a daydrinker without you. It just doesn't work.
I love you too.
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