No stitches, just platelets and will power
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
after the cops left he pulled the weed out of his ass and we smoked it
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
Ryan Reynolds is on sesame street right now. Dressed as a letter A but still sexy as fuck. PBS is so considerate of the stay at home mom.
You don't even know. The entire marching band thinks I'm an alcoholic.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
i think my cat just said my name.
So far in 2016 I told someone id give them a blowjob for lasagna.
Can you please bring the nipple sombrero up?
we went to go have morning sex and I said “I was gonna put my mouth on it but you need to shower”#ruinedthemoment
I guess we coulda said a little less mature audience and a little more e for everyone.
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