I jacked off with the cucumber and then made that fatass a salad.
Well hey if hot cowboys are involved then all bets are off.
Apparently we had sex last night, and then I made him drive me to the beach so I could puke in the ocean.
NASCAR RACE 2010 NO REGRETZZZ!!!
It is literally 8 in the morning.
He won't stop licking me..... im choosing your date next time.
My 16 year old coworker just told me I should take my job more seriously after she watched me puke in the backroom trash can. Fuck teenagers with morals.
Facebook stalking ex-girlfriends who went to rehab. This is my life.
The fact that there are multiple ex-girlfriends who have been to rehab concerns me
You had your dick do your apologizing for you last night. Apology accepted.
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
what are you going as for halloween?
drunk, naked, & emotionally unstable
I invited him to my hotel room via snapchat. I'm one hell of a classy bitch
my lips are numb and my face feels like a pool. PENGUINSSSSSS
Share, now.
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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