Fine. I'll sleep in my office
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
i went to a real vip club. the bathroom attendant was wiping down counters after girls wearing gucci did lines of coke on them. where did MY life go wrong
If I die on my trip, you're my chosen person. Nightstand-vibrators. Computer-iphoto naked pictures. I hope you feel honored.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
I asked this couple what they would like to drink and they leaned toward me eagerly and asked if we still have THE root beer ... Idk if this is code for please add cocaine to my drink
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
I have no idea, I usually just project my awkwardness out like a mating call until it draws other awkward members of the opposite sex out from the bushes
Randomize
