if you could put a roof over IU campus it would be the biggest whorehouse in the nation
there's no food at this bar, but i'm pretty sure vodka is made of wheat so i'm basically drinking bread.
this blows. i told the guy at the bar that i was the DD and it was like i just announced over megaphone that i had genital herpes. no one will talk to me now.
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
i woke up hungover wearing my gym shorts and the condom from last night. Wine bar thursdays rule.
I'm a gay man planning my brothers bachelor party, and he choose someone else to be his best man. I hope they like appltinis and gay clubs. Bastard.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Whatever. I just want to indulge in this mcchicken and forget all about his tiny penis.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
You literally asked him, “Do you come here often? Do you want to visit my vagina?” With no hesitation
Do I masturbate or eat a pound of matazah. Alissa help what do I do??
Randomize