Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
Found my little brother jerking off with a condom. he said he was "practicing"
OMG its one we used last night
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
25 Porn Addicts Admit Their Biggest Pet Peeves
When you start quoting save the last dance you need to stop drinking
You just handed me your ATM card and wrote your PIN number on a dollar bill and said "for bail money."
Shot gunning beers for breakfast. You better be ready for today.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
These 23 People Walked In On Someone And Saw Some Crazy Sh*t
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
my vagina hasn't met your boyfriend yet ... makes me sad
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Dude, where are you?
... whose car?
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I just lifted up my shirt to scratch my stomach n a Dorito flew out of my pullover n it legit scared me when it hit me.