hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
The girl I was getting head from just called my dick an anteater...I hate my parents for not cutting my cock tip off.
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
nothing like baby laughter to ruin a masturbation moment
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
Oh eartly, In cocy youtu youchv make the wallflowers d tskunks!y, couch protection now,.sryou should feel special !
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Literally this kid just told me he's not planning to live past 30. Then he hit himself with a frying pan.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
I don't know if it was the movie or the drugs but after i watched it i wore the same spongebob shirt to school for two weeks and stopped showering
Randomize
