i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
She can't keep using her latex allergy as an excuse to go bareback with everyone.
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
So drunk can't even tell it's my own house. WOaoOw.
all they had in the fridge was rum and filled water balloons
i just opened a seperate checking account to keep track of how much i make and spend on our keggers
Your cum is still running out of me. I pity the next person that tries these jeans on....
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
"I wasn't planning on buying a chicken, but I bought it anyway." --some guy on the bus with a chicken
"Yeah, I only have nine toes." --that same guy
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
the police report says i screamed sanctuary from a jungle gym at the playground when they caught up with us, obviously they disregarded international law.
So how was it?
The cemetery or the sex?
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