My therapist says she wants to work on my 'trust issues'. I think she's found the cash cow within.
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
I don`t remember Saturday, actually
Its ok, i dont remember 2007
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
Ya these assholes wanted to like sit around and eat cupcakes and watch the notebook. I was like fuck you, I want to go make some people uncomfortable in public.
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
That is cause you are some weird type of mutant that lives off of Alcohol.
I blew him while the canoe was sinking...I think of it as the better version of the titanic
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
No that one bar I got kicked out of got closed so that technically doesn't count
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
It was horribly awesome. Its like looking at the sun, you know its bad for you but I just couldn't stop looking.
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
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