Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
I just passed one of the bars and saw my mom kissing another woman. This can't be good....right?
Knowing your life, probably not.
i hope whoever thought of bagged wine flip cup last night has the same hangover as me. not ok.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
By getting lucky do you mean I get one of your incredible BJs or you not killing me by the end of dinner?
A man just poked my foot with his crutches while I'm shitting. Is that how the disabled gays ask for a glory hole blow jay?
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
So I think my motto should be "losing bras and dignity every weekend" but like in a really amazing way
I want to buy weed from this guy on Tinder but I'm not sure I should trust him...but it's free delivery
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
Pro: 2020 made it easier to hook up with strippers
Con: explaining to Kari why there’s always strippers at our house
Pro: there’s always strippers at our house
Randomize
