He is such a gentleman, he paid for my plan b
I'm like a wolly mammoth down there. what do I tell him?
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
This year i'm grateful for nothing other than the discovery that the uncircumcized rumors about him were wrong
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Looking through last night's sexting, realized one is a haiku..
easter 2014 is on 4/20 THIS IS NOT A DRILL YOUR FAMILY WILL EXPECT YOU TO BE HOME AND SOBER I REPEAT THIS IS NOT A DRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had a drunk lesbian experience.... How do I break it to my boyfriend??
I wasn't even hungover I was just mourning my dignity
OH GOOD GOD THE BUFFALO WING SAUCE IS BURNING MY FUCKING CUNT. WHY THE FUCK DID I AGREE TO SPICY AND NOT MILD
this is the fourth time i've taken my clothes off for money this year. is that normal for the average college sophomore?
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
I'm drunk and don't know where I am. There's a giant metal penguin if that helps.
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