Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just spit dirty mouth water on my dentist. and apparently grinning sheepishly and saying "my b" doesn't make it better
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
Thats my favorite, when ex girlfriends become XL ex girlfriends
I tried telling you she just blew me in the bathroom but you were too busy making out with her to listen
I'm pretty sure you thought I could absorb alcohol through my dress
luckily my workout playlist doubles as a masturbation playlist.
But you have work tomorrow. And a whore to pick up. And a dinner to eat. And a vagina to slaughter. Your day is full!
I appreciate the concept of vaginal slaughtering.
Woke up in a wet suit with my junk cut out. In a strange apartment. Just found thing biggest bong u have ever seen. WHERE ARE YOU?!?!?!
I want a burrito.
Truly, you are the voice of a generation.
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
So I got drunk last night and attempted to shave a landing strip on my vag. I now have a 8 lane highway on my crotch now. Just looks like a random ass square.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
And I just got smacked in the face by my cat. Apparently I'm supposed to be awake now.
It stopped being casual for me when I waxed my vagina for you
Randomize
