I will die if light touches me.
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
I mean, I gave him a hand job on the Pearl Harbor tour bus; I don't know what the fuck else he wants out of this "relationship"
You know how hard it is to jerk off in a bathtub with a dog staring at you?
We didn't have sex but he is somehow naked and laying on top of me. his dick is touching my leg and freaking me the fuck out.
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Sounds good. I will just get tanked here and wear this batman mask.
Question: If I got in a car accident and lost my memory of us, would you work your way back just so we could be fuck buddies again?
I'm watching The Vow and just need to know that I'm loved in some way
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
(440): please tell me you didn't have sex in my dress.. IT'S A VIRGIN DRESS.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
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