i don't like sucking hair
idk, i just don't think periods are something you can catch in a little cup.
i am doomed to only fuck guys with curved cocks
this will be a night to untag.
The neighbors outside are screaming at one another about God knows what and everyone is too scared to go outside and we NEEd more beer
Beer acquired. Food is cooking
Wow, you are almost sliding into home plate for some stellar fellatio
I'd rather blow Nickelback than be told he gave me gonorrhea. I'd even post it on Facebook for all of the world to like, share, and judge me.
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
Kids parked next to me are getting it on. I'm eating chicken nuggets listening to Kanye alone. Happy Valentine's Day.
Yeah you were fine except for when you peed under the bar
Your "whiskey dick" is glorious but also terrifying
They gave my sperm a pep talk after they found out we were trying.to have.a baby.
We found you with your penis in the vacum hose crying softly...
I peed in my closet, which at the time looked like a sparkly bathroom...
My body isnt used to all this fresh air, sun and booze....ok well maybe just the fresh air and sun...its used to the booze.
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