I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
we have officially mastered the walk of shame
His shirt was in the kitchen sink this morning, I'm pretty sure my roommates know.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Lame. Party is tapping out at 4am. Even chanting "USA" didn't rally them.
Just bought the plane tickets. Light headed. Blood rush to clit oh god blue clit. Mayday mayday vagina down!
It's like a double rainbow in both sides of the sky mixed with The Jeffersons.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When I say "is it a bad idea to do Mollie before an 8hr shift tomorrow?" I dont want to hear the truth I want to hear you encouraging my bad decisions
My boobs just got me out of my third ticket last night
i'm so proud. i woke up to nearly seven feet of basketball player in my bed this morning
you win. again.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Hey also tomorrow casually bring up wearing crocs to your sister's wedding
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
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