I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
so, is "hi, did i take your virginity six years ago and never call afterwards?" an appropriate greeting in a bar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
Dude she's famous. She's on an episode of campus pd. Can't not fuck her
Dude. I only took a 20 out the ATM last night. How do I have 83 ones?
You stole from the strippers again. I wish I was ninja like you
And then we were riding the keg in the pool like an 8 second rodeo...naked.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
lesbians are really intense tho, she made me take her eye makeup off and told me she was going to eat me for breakfast
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize