I just pulled the condom that i lost on tues out of me at work ewwww!
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
I'm surprised you like me... I didn't think I was your type.
Blonde hair and big tits is every guys type.
get to allyx's house asap
Ok is everything ok
Yeah, theres just lesbians
omg yes on my way
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
They won't let us do straight shots of 151 since that guy lit his face on fire.
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
My mom has finally acknowledged my soft spot for Russians. Finally.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
He stole all of his parent's vodka WHILE they were in the room, and then opened the window and snuck out. I was watching from my truck
He spelled Steven with "ph", needless to say my nose was almost bleeding from the amount of axe he was wearing.
Idk I saw a cheetah print onesie and it reminded me of your Lion King fantasy.
Hey bring in backup. its going to take a lot more beer than we think to fill up the water bed...
Pretty sure he proposed because my house is awesome. His ass is a ten and he's offering to pay more than half the bills... How expensive is a divorce really? I mean I could probably put up with him for three or four years but a lifetime is a big ask.
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