dude relax anyone of us could have gotten that girl pregnant
so after six weeks of dating she admitted shes bi and asked if it would freak me out if we brought another girl into the bedroom. i said no in this hesitant voice and she said 'if you let me dont worry ill make it up to you'
i literally fucking hate you so fucking much.
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
I know. He gave me a hug and i was like jesus i can just feel the std through your sweatshirt
It's christmas eve and my mom blacked out before me. If she beat me at that, what have I been learning at college?
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I have a LOT of reasons to worry about radical feminists taking my lady balls, frankly. A lot.
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Are you ok?
They gave me a cat until I fall asleep. His name is fluffy because he's fluffy.
so much tequila, so little girl.
I mean, I already saw his dick in person and wasn't impressed so why is he sending me a picture of it, anyway? I hate re-runs!
Burnt food and a broken vibrator. Disappointment after disappointment. Is April a man?
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
Randomize
