I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
worst part about day drinking... waking up to george lopez
Drunk in my research methods class at 9:30 in the morning. We should do a quantitative analysis of my mimosa consumption.
I am both scared and jealous.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
IM FEEDING MY CAT ALL THE HAM
Dude I woke up and he was pissing in the corner on his clothes... I called his name an he replied " I got this" and continued.
every time someone would wish me happy birthday I would be like "thanks happy birthday to you too"
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
First thing I find in the car I just pick up from my grandpa? A discount card for the strip club down the road from his apartment. The force is still strong.
Keep in mind this was 2012... YOLO was a very new concept.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Our baby is creepy.
That's how we know it's ours. haha
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