have you ever wondered what it would feel like to stick those coneheads in your vaj
omg every time its on
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
i asked why he had a giant piece of popcorn duct taped to his head and he said "No, it's actually part of my neck." so no, i didn't fuck him.
possible father of this baby just finished his test first in a lecture of 200 people. other possible father finished about 100th.
I'm rooting for #1.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
I need to stop having one night stands with guys in my building so I can have someone to borrow milk from without it being awkward
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
they night at the roxbarryed us. came out of nowhere,bought us shots, and then the big one licked my hand? we got out of that noise.
woke up holding a soft boiled egg cup and empty bottle of rum. apparently i couldn't find a shot glass
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I draw, I play three woodwind instruments, I press buttons for eight hours at work and Im studying to be a gynecologist... I guarantee I can make you squirt, babe.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
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