I'm giving you permission to use the abortion money to pay for your DUI.
Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
I wish real life had facebook tags so i could figure out who all these people are
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
I really hope he dies in a tragic kegstand mishap
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
seriously. next time...underwear. I'm not spending any other holiday season wondering if it'll be my last babyless one.
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
The acoustics in my bra are fantastic.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
I just woke up naked next to a GetGo sandwich and I can hear my cats are eating my combos. So that's my life.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
I have already put on my inside pants.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Randomize
