also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
he drunkenly pissed himself on the deck, in the bathroom, and on my couch within the span of an hour
its like an avodart commercial...maybe he has a growing problem
Even my psychiatrist thinks I should fuck the married guy.
The fact that he is from Canada is way more embarrassing than the fact that you met him on match.com
I broke his nose at the bar and he still went home with me.
We had a pillow fight. It looks like an angel exploded here. A DRUNK ALCOHOLIC ANGEL
Thanks for letting me in last night. I was drunkenly sleepwalking.
Nothing like cleaning out your cleavage from lunch, finding cookie crumbs and eating them...
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
You're his holy grail. The moment he finally gets you to orgasm he'll probably just retire and become a monk.
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
So today the police came to my dorm to look for weed, i didn't have any in the room, so i let them in. they apologized for any inconvenience and then left after finding nothing. then i realized i was wearing gauges with weed leaves on them lol
So some guy thought I took second place in a male stripper competition
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