Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
I'll let you put expensive food in me, but really, not much else.
Dude, hurry and get over. I need a wingman. She is on her 6th vodka shot and her resident ugly friend is still sober
Not only did a random toaster end up in my house last night, it's also full of skittles.
no guy is ever going to take you seriously as a potential marriage prospect unless you learn to swallow
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
I just washed champagne and tuna off my body. I feel like that was a successful shower.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
If it was designed to hold water, it was designer to hold wine
I think my Halloween costume this year will be made entirely of pillows and I'll be Marshmellow girl or Kirby. That way I'm comfortable, warm, and if I fall over drunk I'm safe.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
It was dumb but not something to force me into sobriety
Standing straight up with intensity he came in his own mouth. I know this because he showed me the video from five different angles when asked if I would like him to demonstrate. And I did.
Randomize
