i just fell asleep at my computer and i woke up and in the google bar it said delicious foods to eat
Ben's a prick.
What Ben are you talking about?
All the bens across all the lands
if you were to get worldwide popularity from playing guitar with a plastic yellow bat while drunk on YouTube, would you hate me?
I'm really tired of cleaning up my twitter the morning after
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
No... We were arguing over whose family is more dysfunctional... Then my brother stumbled in and puked all over jakes ugly dog.
Drunk me thinks I can light up a cig anywhere, sober me finds this hilarious and highly irresponsible. The grocery store is not a bar.
And I really REALLY don't feel like cleaning cinnamon off my penis tonight.
If our text convos ever saw the light of day lives would be in tatters
I woke up naked on his boat with a cowboy hat on with a boat cover over me... Thank you tequila!
Just saw an all male dolphin threesome from underwater viewing
Hatred of squirrels is the least of my hereditary problems.
if you arent using your penis to save lives, then what good is it?
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
