I'm such a slut...i kept having sex with him after he called me his ex gf's name. I just felt like i deserved something out of it too.
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I need to sanitize my soul.
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
Before getting out of the car, she said "Thanks for getting me off." I like how polite she is.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
I got so drunk I thought my tennis court was a corn field so I laid in it and ate pizza
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
I tied him up for his boyfriend so he could get fisted... I'm the best roommate ever.
Wow. That's certainly more than I've ever done for a roommate.
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