dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
Apparently someone switched my cash for monopoly money after midnight so I couldn't get any more drinks at the bar
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Road construction signs are deceptively heavy
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
So, we estimated there is at least 40 pounds of boob in our house.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
You told me you had two boobs that want to be naked for me. I'm just following up on your request.
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
My brother walked up to us as we were making out and was like "hey man, go to town!" and winked
It's just great that Easter is on 4/20 this year. Now everyone can enjoy the Easter egg hunts. And being around my whole family.
I blacked out after the piñata full of condoms
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