i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
if you think for one second that i'm not using my mittens as hand puppets at the bar tonight then u dont know me at all!
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
He didn't speak any English, but I think I caught the word turtle in there somewhere.
Why would he say turtle mid-fuck?
I've grown up since last year. I don't give blow jobs as birthday presents anymore.
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
I just peed behind the dumpster and dedicated it to you. Can i call u?
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
I was looking up travel destinations and somehow I ended up reading Paul's first letter to the Corinthians. I need to start going to church high...
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Now in listening to Jerome Bettis speak at the hall of fame and my boner just started twirling a terrible towel
well, you know. whores of a feather.
Drunk me says 72 hours of Mexican Viagra and room service.Sober me says we stopped being lovers for a reason after the last lost weekend.
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