I thought at least he would want to exchange numbers after he tried to put it in my bum
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
NC is no longer selling 190 proof Everclear. We are officially no longer the greatest state.
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
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figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
He came over drunk in a speedo i told him he has my vote he said who are you voting for when i said obama he took off running and shouting i was worthless like an empty beer can
My mom opened up my bank statement today....my first alcohol intervention class is at 7:30am tomorrow.
I'll have party bus drop you off in the morning.
Fun fact: the guy I banged last night. His middle name on his birth certificate is "Windstorm."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My mind doesn't wanna day drink but my heart does.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
You're going to love the baby's room.
I doubt it. I can't have sex there anymore. That severely limits the appeal of the room to me.
I am the most hated person in hoboken. Ive been doing drunken cake boss impressions down the street for the past 20 mins.
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
Can I send you a random dick pic? It's got a lightsaber tattoo
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