I'm in your bed right now
Okay meet you there give me 10
Don't think you can make me leave either
Give me ten I ha e to be ******'s wingman I want you
You're the only person with a favorite bar in Disneyworld
a girl just told me i should have been born earlier in the alphabet
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
You started laughing mid-cry and when I asked you said, "my tears taste like vodka."
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
you really cant fit homeless dj into your budget? doubles as charity
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
I need to establish a pattern of dominance early.... I'm like a slutty Cesar Milan
We were pulling the glow sticks off of him and he just kept yelling, "my bones! You're taking my bones!" and asking me if I was on the crew team
show concern. Mark ate a butterfly and proceeded to drink more shots like nothing happened
So did you grab that log full of poison ivy for the fire and then apparently take a piss on Saturday night too or was that just me?
will we ever learn or are we destined for a life of poison ivy covered balls?
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
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