Well I thought that next 8 ball would either kill us or turn us into Gods
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
Hello, balls-out mistake. It's been a while.
If Billy Mays did an infomercial on your dick, it still wouldn't get you laid.
You dont ever try to use your dick as a power washer to get bits of poop of the toilet bowl?
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Actually some of the best sex I've had involved a lot of laughing.
How small IS your cock?
She looks like she smells of sausage, sunblock and sorrow.
I didn't even have pants on and you think I had an agenda
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
I just snorted sandwich everywhere.
I hope it smells nice :)
IT DOESN'T BECAUSE I HAVE MEAT COMING OUT OF MY NOSE, DAMNIT.
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