You can't special order awesome
i think i want to fuck a midget just to see how difficult it would be
I swear if it wasn't for meeting for drug dealers @ gas stations, i would never remember to get gas.
We have to have sex while I'm dressed as a tiger. It's one of my life goals
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
It was a taxi full of fist pumps and chanting to "face down, ass up". It was that 1% that makes my job worth it.
Well I can cross being naked in a minivan off the list
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
for real. if he messaged me that i'd have made his penis cower in a corner.
Don't worry my mom is buying me a vasectomy for Christmas
Im so hungover I just threw up at the sight of a CARTOON CRABBY PATTY
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
Are you going to regret this?
No I do t think so
Ok then he can enter the holy dorm temple.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
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