He is either going to be in my pants or get a restraining order against me.
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I'm taking child development now so if you get pregnant i can raise your child no worries
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
I cagt a turtle and named him squirt. He's in my bathtub Caleb is feeding me peaches! This is the most beautiful vodka Thursday ever!
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
I have bits of ceiling fan all over now
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
No matter how long you've been away, there's nothing quite like pooping at your parents' house
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
Randomize
