you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
That would explain his violent outburst while watching barefoot contessa...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Lol. No. We cannot eat chicken while we have sex. No.
In the sauna. Drunk. When I close my eyes I think I'm a dog. Is that wrong?
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Yeah. I had to take off my shirt. It's soaked in weakness.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
The amount of drunk I'm going to get tonight will be somewhere between Jim lahey and bojack horseman
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I don’t care that he’s a decade younger. He’s cute and I need a good penising
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