Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
fuck your aforementioned shoe
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
I'm covered in sharpie and the girl next to me just said something smells like fried food. Hint: it's me. Why am I in class?
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
It's a toss up. They'll either laugh and watch you drunkenly fuck on the beach or they'll throw you deep in Mexican jail.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
she has that "i will punish you like your mom did" vibe, i think guys like that.
Are you drinking tequila at 1pm? ...at Disneyland?
Did you poop on the roof?
WTH?
Is that a no?
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
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