he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
you kept running around the room with a flask shouting "so much room for activities!" then someone tripped you and you passed out
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
No, I stopped taking my meds because I like crazy me better
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Wanna show up on a guy's doorstep and punch him in the balls for me? At least this one isn't a cop.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
Would you think less of me if I were eating pizza on the toilet right now?
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
They're gonna put "is a hoe" on my medical records
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
Randomize
