Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
census says that i am hotter than the girl you just left with...sad for you
I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
this guy just used the pickup line "God must have spent a little more time on you" I recognized the nsync lyric immediately.
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
I may only be a second year med student but I feel very confident in calling that a micropenis.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Mcdonalds hasn't even finished serving breakfast yet and u two are getting drunk?
Remember that night I drank a bunch of vodka, pounded your Jameson because 'you were a pussy', punched you in the face and ran off as fast as my high heels could go? It was just my Russian and Irish sides fighting for genetic dominance
Seriously, I look like I crawled out of a bog. Succeeding at being as undateable as possible.
Is Oprah even human
Can I use your boat
Also, what’s the deal with international water? Do they have signs out there like a city does or do I need a map?
WTH is going on? It’s the middle of the night
Randomize
