I actually told the people in the movie theatre to give me a cup and I would dip water from the toilet before I paid $4.50 for a bottle of water.
maybe i'll see you again later :)
I'd rather shit a knife.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
She said, "I don't really go out much, but my husband recently cheated on me" and I don't remember anything after that.
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She fuckin peed on me
Stay golden ponyboy
I'm not sending you pictures to jack off to. That's not what friends do
Don't you realize there's more to life than sex and pizza rolls?
He asked if he could pull one of my teeth "to remember me by"
If you're asking how many times you took off your clothes and played with the tiki torches.....the answer is 3.
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Finding out you're not a mother on Mother's Day >>>
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
dude it was our first time and her hair caught on fire from the candles on the nightstand
There is no way that actually happened!
the smell of burnt hair covered up the sweaty sex smell.
On another note, I kinda only wanna poop laying down now
The last thing I remember saying was "Tequila for all!!"
If you count the sounds from the room down the hall....that was definitely NOT the last thing that came out of your mouth.
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