Broke my phone, have no voice AND I was blackout by 3 p.m...I'm betting I had a great time.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
There is a mermaid on oprah and she looks nothin like ariel
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
I even made an effort to dress like a conservative young lady who doesnt black out and throw up in her bed regularly today.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
party gras won. party gras always wins.
you wouldn't believe how quickly birth control dissolves in vodka
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
Ive only just recently decided that NOT fucking you would be best for both of us.
Let's never forget the time I met you while you were running down the street naked and in handcuffs.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
I couldn’t resist. He had a camouflage condom. You know I love a man in a uniform
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